I have once again won the bad mom award. Not only did I not believe my child, but I blogged about it. Then the truth came out. He was right. I was shamefully wrong.

It happened at parents’ night last night. I jumped ship early at the nursery school parent orientation (at which I was required to be present even though this is my SIXTH year in a row I have attended the thing) and boogied into Tyler’s parent night – late. I slid into a seat next to my hubby and ignored the disapproving looks of the other parents. When we had a break for snack, odd I know – but a chance to mingle with the other parents, I approached the teacher we called the other night.

ME: “I’m really sorry about that phone call the other night.”

Mrs. K: “It’s no problem. I misspeak sometimes.”

ME: “I tried to explain to him that he misunderstood you but he wouldn’t listen.”

Mrs. K: “He’s always on top of things. Only one other child picked up on my error.”

ME: sudden realization dawning “He was right?”

Mrs. K: “Yes, only two of them picked up on it. Tyler picks up on everything. It’s great.”

ME: “You mean Tyler was paying close enough attention to notice this? He was right? The teacher misspoke? Are we really talking about Tyler? Oh, my, GOD! I am the worst parent ever!”

Actually, I didn’t say those last things. What I said was, “Thanks again for taking the call. It helped a lot.”

I then ran to my husband to tell him what a bad mom I am. “…I argued for ages. I told him he misunderstood. No wonder he cried. I didn’t believe him.”

Let’s make more space on the mantle. Oh no, it’s getting a bit crowded. At this rate we’d better build some shelves.

Make room on the mantle for another Bad Mom Award. I sent my oldest off to camp and failed to make arrangements for his safe return. Yes, it’s true.

I did know one of two people would deliver him from camp to town. I did not know which person would do it and where they would leave him. To be fair, neither person would ever abandon him on the side of the road. My dilemma today was having one child with fever, one child with bug bites the size of oreos, and one child needing to be picked up at camp 40 minutes away. Oh, and not to forget the one being delivered at the same time. Delivered somewhere, I just wasn’t sure where.

I did have one cell phone number. In a karmic event I called and called that number about 5 times during the drive to pick up child #3. Rang but no answer. Anxiety. Now usually I am a logical woman. They won’t leave him. He’ll be fine. They’ll call the house and bring him home. Unfortunately, I am either having PMS or am pregnant again (which BTW CAN’T happen anymore). I’ve been weepy all day. I’ve also had that feeling of dread and anxiety – a weight on my chest. (okay, stop with the dirty thoughts already)

Finally, got a hold of the person with the cell phone. Yes, she had him. Yes, she was planning on bringing him to the house. Relax. It’s fine. There was no cell reception at camp.

You’d think I’d be feeling better. Not so. Something seems to be in the air and I’m not sure what. I’m suppose to be leaving tomorrow for my big weekend but I’m not packed, not mentally ready and still don’t even know what time I am leaving. I don’t even know who will watch the kids.

All I know is the kids kicked me off the computer all day, the bitten child has a Dr.’s appointment at 9:30 am, the fevered one should probably have an appointment, the drama king has a performance at 11:30 am (which I will have to find streetside parking downtown in the city) and the camp returnee has notified me that I am “the worst mother in the world” while in hysterical tears.

Requirements for being the

Worst Mother in the World:

1. no video games in house
2. set your nine year old’s bedtime yourself
3. limit the friends they have over so you can retain your sanity
4. All-in-all, make sure he is not even a little bit like his friends (becasue of 1-3)

Now I’m guessing it’s exhaustion that is prompting the outburst. The problem with that is the solution is to get him to bed early which then means he doesn’t get to go to Grammy’s to play video games, stay up late or have a friend over.

The one part I still haven’t told you all? Last night I had a dream I was pregnant. Not only scary but impossible. Scary because I’ve only had pregnant dreams right before I found out I was pregnant. Impossible because I have been surgically “fixed”.