Tell me it is not really Friday. Tell me!

It is much too soon to be Friday. I have too much to do. I’ve had such a busy week and now the kids have the day off of school and I HAVE SO MUCH TO DO!

Apparently someone is trying to kill me with all the stuff I must do. Add to that the weather is PERFECT with a capital P. We’re talking shorts and t-shirt weather. I want to go out and play. I do not want to Spring clean my bathroom and do eleventy million loads of laundry. But… time to go and get it done…

Later! I hope you all enjoy the weather (if it cooperates).

I really had to comment today about Lost. Really. Because O.M.G! Did you see last night’s episode?

That map and the lockdown.

The whole ‘who is Henry Gale’ thing.

And Locke. I really like Locke. I always have. He really needs to stop being so trusting though. Also, I kept waiting for them to show us why he was in the wheelchair. I mean with him possibly needing it again and all. But no dice. So I sat on the edge of my seat and every flashback they showed I waited for it to happen. hmmm…

As for the whole poker thing? So what. It was nice to see Jack acting like a human again and not so controlling bully but really, he was still in control and it just didn’t do it for me. Can’t this guy ever NOT be in charge?

So in all? Glad I’m still watching. I still think we better get some more answers quick or I may have to hunt down the writers. But it felt, at least for last night, that they’re moving the story along again.

Comments? Thoughts? What did you think about Lost last night? Do you watch it? Do you still watch it? What’s the 411 on your Lost viewing?

Anyone whose been here a while knows I speak of my children as annoyances. They bug me. They bug each other. They really friggin’ bug the crap out of me! Most days.

But lately I’ve been feeling rather sappy towards them. Really. That whole ‘when your child is born you start wearing your heart on the outside’ thing? Been feeling it lately. Not that I didn’t feel it when they were born – but for a while there? It was gone. I was trying to get through my days. Many days I no longer remember. Many years that are a blur. The whole 4 kids under 6 thing? Blur. Elementary schedules, preschool schedules, nursing schedules all at the same time? Blur. It may have gotten better when the third went off to kindergarten but that is about when the depression set in. So? Blur.

Blur. Blur. Blur.

But now? Now I feel like I just woke up. And there are these kids. Four of them. And they are big. And they are growing. Growing taller and growing up. They are also growing away from me. Not a lot. Just a bit. But still. The older two (11 & 9) walk home from school every day. Every day they spend a bit of time with a bunch of other kids. Unsupervised. What do they talk about? What do they do to each other? Who knows. I’m sure they curse and complain and I KNOW they talk about the online computer game they all play.

I know they need this time to grow. I know as they get older they will spend more and more time with their friends doing their own things. And now I know why it is so hard for parents to let them go. I really didn’t get it until just now. Really, this very minute.

When I think back to my own childhood, that is what I remember. The times on the bus. The times in school. The inbetween times. The times it was just my friends and I.

I keep trying to remind myself the kids NEED this time. They need to have unsupervised time. They need to venture out on their own. Make their own choices and make their own mistakes. And as long as the time is limited and monitored, I need to see if I did my job and taught them well.

IT. IS. SOOOO. HARD.

So much can go wrong. But it seems to be more wrong to not allow them this chance to test their wings in our little town. In our small neighborhood. In our community where they know so many people and all the parents are looking out for them. It seems like a safe gamble. But yet, it’s still a gamble. I’d like to say I can’t gamble with my kids’ safety but just having them is such a gamble. And waiting until they are grown to give them freedom? It seems like a bigger gamble.

So, I’m convinced it is the right decision. They must unfurl their wings. Bit by bit. I’ve spent the last 11 years monitoring their every breath. Now they must breath on their own. And of course, I must watch like a hawk for the results.

He just called me AGAIN. Seriously.

Thanks to all of you who reassured me. I know that I’m doing the right thing. But of course, I’m always questioning if I’m being one of those parents. The ones that nag and interfere and make the teacher’s life miserable. I really don’t want to make his life more difficult.

Also, to be fair, I must mention that the call I received yesterday was not bad or annoying. He was checking on Dylan because he was the sick child I mentioned. Home from school with a fever and headache. He wanted to know if he should send work home if Dylan was out again today and to tell me that it was fine if I wanted him to talk to my SIL I just needed to make sure I signed the release form.

And the best part? It was the first time he spoke to me without the undertones of condescension or superciliousness or even insecurity. I’m wondering if he talked to his wife about it. Or maybe he talked to some of the other teachers in the teacher’s lounge (I know many of them). Maybe someone convinced him I wasn’t unhappy with him but just wanted to help. Maybe he realized his first reaction was a bit of an overreaction. Whatever it was, he seemed to speak to me in a normal tone. He seemed willing to help. He seemed to not think I’m an overreacting lunatic. So all is good. Well, all except Dylan is still behind and I’m not the best person to help him as we tend to war over work. But, whatever. I have the support of those around me. He’s got the brains. We’ve got until September to catch him up. I think it will all be good in the end.

So, in closing (No, I shouldn’t have been a lawyer. I just play one on my blog – HA!), I may be a bit excitable when it comes to my kids’ educations. I may be willing to call everyone and anyone I think can assist with advice and/or actual support of their learning.

Besides, he still calls me 10x’s more than I call him. So if anyone’s a nag…